Why You Should Bring Joss Whedon on Your First Date

Day 124: Dating my husband the reboot  

PLEASE PROCEED WITH MY FULL ASSURANCE THERE ARE NO ULTRON SPOILERS IN THIS BLOG POST 

Joss Whedon is my Hero

I love Joss Whedon.  Not a crazy stalker kind of love.  But I am so moved by his storytelling that spans different mediums from the big screen to his awesome comics.  One of the best aspects of his storytelling is his ability to create an ensemble that portrays real life interpersonal relationships diluted with hilarious quips.  A few, I am showing amazing self-restraint here, but a few examples of my favorite lines include:

“The thing about changing the world... Once you do it, the world's all different.”
― Joss Whedon, Buffy the Vampire Slayer: The Long Way Home

“I'm not a leader now. I'm a whole damn army.”
― Joss Whedon, Fray

“He is reproducing faster than catholic bunnies.”

― Joss Whedon, Age of Ultron

Dr. Horrible & Captain Hammer (me n hubs)

Plus Joss is unapologetically a feminist and supports women both through his art and his fame.  Since I am obsessed with all things Joss it goes with out saying that I had to see Avengers 2: Age of Ultron on opening night.

Sci-Fi /Action Movies 101

Though my Joss love runs deep, seeing action movies at the stroke of midnight is not a new thing for me.

I think the hubs for first realized the depth of my geekiness on May 18, 1999 when I convinced him to ditch school so we could be first in line to see the midnight showing of Star Wars Episode I: The Phantom Menace.  If convincing him to wait in line for 16 plus hours was not proof enough I was also a 17-year old girl that brought a light saber with me to the movie (yup I am a big ole’ geek). 

This was the night that he also first experienced my interactive relationship with action movies.  I get really excited and often will clap, cheer, curse, or dialogue with the screen while I watch an action movie.  This is a learned habit for which I blame my mother who took me to Rocky Horror for so many years.  But I am not embarrassed by my behavior, when you attend an action movie on opening night the room is usually packed and filled with anticipation, so my conduct goes largely unnoticed (thank you rowdy teenage boys).  However, further into our relationship the hubs would realize that even during matinees filled with gray hair I will holler at the screen.  Needless to say he pretty much always tries to get me into a full theatre on opening night. 

But it is not just the excitement of seeing it before anyone else.  Or that there is almost always crazy good previews.  And it is not just the relief that you can open your computer without fear of spoilers.  The collective energy of the crowd combined with the big screen makes it the only way to experience a big action or sci-fi movie.

Dating My Husband

Over the last few months I have played a lot of video games with the hubs.  We have gone to couples therapy, retreats, church, and lots of other group functions together.  But last night was the first time in 124 days that we have gone on an actual date.  And I have to say it was so weird. 

For a few minutes I felt self-conscious for being the only one clapping in the theatre when the Marvel title appeared.  But once mesmerized by the amaze-balls special effects that nervousness wore off because I kinda forgot the hubs was there (I know that is bitchy but seriously Joss has the ability to totally captivate me).

I had yoga before the movie so we arrived at the theatre separately.  Arriving was made all that more strange because there was nostalgia attending the same rinky-dink theatre that I dragged him to so many years ago to see Star Wars.  Even in the fervor of the occasion there were many moments that I felt the overwhelming since of grief that has plagued me for the last few months start to creep in.  

I was still on a date with a fellow geek but he is not the same guy I married and he never will be.  Well ain’t that a kick in the pants?  Tip of the day: when things are crazy awkward-- taking your wife to see a blockbuster movie written and directed by her hero is a great buffer (heh heh buffer, get it?).

99 Days of Emotional Video Game Blogging

Day 99: The Audit

April 15^th is a day most grown ups dread and like other procrastinating adults we were derailed from gaming by the taxman.  The only gaming that took place yesterday was a few moves of mobile Carcossone.  But the government is not the only reason we were distracted we have also spent much of our downtime watching an episode of the new Netflix show DareDevil. 

There are 24 hours left until “D-day.”  I euphemistically referred to tomorrow, or the end of 100 days, as when I would make the choice between Diablo and divorce.  And it is probably a good sign that over the last few weeks I have stopped labeling my blog posts with the word divorce but as every good researcher knows, current trends do not determine final outcomes.  Today the plan is to get the hubs the moment he gets off work and get as much gaming in as possible.

I have been working on an audit about how this experiment has changed me emotionally, my relationship with the hubs, and if it provided any insight into what to do with our broken marriage.  The thing that surprised me the most is that I wrote as much about my feelings as I did what games we played.   

I have decided to map my blog.  To create themes and sub-themes of the topics and emotions that have filled the last 100 days.  I placed asterisks next to my favorite post in each category.  

Guess what I am thinking about (hint: not taxes). 

The Experiment

Quitting my Marriage and Picking Up a Controller- Day 1

Why Play Games Instead of Getting a Divorce?-Day 4

 Can Video Games Save a Marriage?- Day 10

 12 Years of Holding Hands and Holding Controllers-Day 11

Gone Girl the Game- Day 13

The Husband's Side of the Story- Day 18

Why I don't just play games for my husband.-Day 23

Treacherous River in Kern: Love and aBroken Marriage- Day 39

Love and Legos- Day 41

My Centennial(100th) Blog Post dedicated to Wil Wheaton- Day 43

**The Laundry Goblins- Day 51

Warmachine Widow- Day 54

Helldivers- Day 61 

Married People Play Video Games in a Scandalous Way- Day 65

The Hubs Guest Blog 2.0- Day 67

Far and Away from my PS4- Day 77

Video Games and Indoctrinating our Youth-Day86

Emotional Venting

Bring it on

Why Play Games Instead of Getting a Divorce?-Day 4

The Hardest Thing I Have Ever Done in MyLife- Day 16

Things that are Hard 2.0 –Day 17 

**Why I don't just play games for my husband.-Day 23

Gear is Better than Roses- Day 37

Living in the Shadow of a Kick A$$ Wife- Day41

My Centennial(100th) Blog Post dedicated to Wil Wheaton- Day 43

Tales of a Wannabe Slayer-Day 47

Tales of a Wannabe Slayer Part 2- Day 48

Warmachine Widow- Day 54

Helldivers: Survive the hard stuff and don't shoot your wife-Day 63 

Spit, Teach, Love: Today's Rant about Hope instead of Gaming- Day64

Gamer Family and Geek Parenting

I hope you dance- Day 8

Leaving My Family- Day 29 

Rapists, Video Games, and Valentines Day- Day 35

Love and Legos- Day 41

My Centennial(100th) Blog Post dedicated to Wil Wheaton- Day 43

**The Hubs Guest Blog 2.0- Day 67

Video Games and Indoctrinating our Youth-Day 86

Chronicles of  Gaming Mommy - Day 93

Geek family FTW

Romance

I hope you dance- Day 8

12 Years of Holding Hands and Holding Controllers-Day 11

Gone Girl the Game- Day 13

Leaving My Family- Day 29 

Rapists, Video Games, and Valentines Day- Day35

Gear is Better than Roses- Day 37

**A Treacherous River in Kern: Love and aBroken Marriage- Day 39

Kissing brown hair 

Kissing blue hair 

Love and Legos- Day 41

Big Eyes, Small Mouth- Day 52

Married People Play Video Games in a Scandalous Way- Day 65 

Far and Away from my PS4- Day 77

Video Games and Indoctrinating our Youth-Day86

Beauty and Self Esteem

The Infamous Blue Hair

**F-ck Tropes and Resolutions- Day 3

Things that are Hard 2.0 –Day 17

Living in the Shadow of a Kick A$$ Wife- Day41

Tales of a Wannabe Slayer-Day 47

Tales of a Wannabe Slayer Part 2- Day 48

Glitter vs Jem Part 1- Day 52
 
Glitter vs Jem Part 2- Day 53
 
Helldivers: Survive the hard stuff and don't shoot your wife-Day 63
 
Glitter vs JemPart 3- Day 68

The Hubs

DM with a Hairbow

The Husband's Side of the Story- Day 18 

Why I don't just play games for my husband.-Day 23

Gear is Better than Roses- Day 37

A Treacherous River in Kern: Love and a Broken Marriage- Day 39 Love and Legos- Day 41

Warmachine Widow- Day 54

 **Helldivers- Day 61

Married People Play Video Games in a Scandalous Way- Day 65 

Video Games and Indoctrinating our Youth-Day 86

The Hubs Guest Blog 2.0- Day 67

Warmachine

Things that are Hard 2.0 –Day 17

Rapists, Video Games, and Valentines Day- Day35

**Warmachine Widow- Day 54

Wil Wheaton

**The Return of Hope aka Wil Wheaton –Day 27

Upgrade your phone, not your wife- Day 30

My Centennial(100th) Blog Post dedicated to Wil Wheaton- Day 43

Helldivers: Survive the hard stuff and don't shoot your wife-Day 63

Buffy

Living in the Shadow of a Kick A$$ Wife- Day41

**Tales of a Wannabe Slayer-Day 47

Tales of a Wannabe Slayer Part 2- Day 48

Community of Play (#gatheryourparty) 

Love and Legos- Day 41

**Big Eyes, Small Mouth- Day 52

Far and Away from my PS4- Day 77

 

Travelling

Gone Girl the Game- Day 13

Things that are Hard 2.0 –Day 17

Leaving My Family- Day 29 

Upgrade your phone, not your wife- Day 30

**Far and Away from my PS4- Day 77
 

Shopping and Money

Trade-In Underwear for Games- Day 9

**Gone Girl the Game- Day 13

Shooter Games 

I tried… but I still hate Shooters

Helldivers- Day 61 

**Helldivers: Survive the hard stuff and don't shoot your wife-Day 63

Far and Away from my PS4- Day 77

The Hubs Guest Blog 2.0- Day 67

The Husband's Side of the Story

Day 18: Bar room brawls 

What are your feelings about the “100 Days of Gaming” blog?

I love the blog, it is a way that we chronicle the way we have connected as friends, then partners, and then best friends. We lost that connection a while back and it feels great to commit to finding it again. 

I also think it is a very healthy outlet for Dr. CCB’s myriad of thoughts.  I am always excited to read the next post, and contrary to what some might believe, I have no idea what is written until the rest of the world does. 

I love games, it is one of my favorite things to do, and being able to share the joy that they bring with my best friend is pretty d*mn awesome. 

What is your partner’s most annoying habit as a gamer?

This one is easy, her inability to use two thumb sticks.  I understand that it's not the easiest skill and that I've had a lot more practice but whenever a game needs you to move with one and look with others it ends poorly.  This is the big reason why she has had so little success with shooters. 

A close second, is how freaking stubborn she can be.  She will get stuck at something stupid for what seems like hours and I can't help, if I do it's like I have taken her pride and stomped on it.  What's funny is this is one of the few arenas I have always taken help when offered.  I remember staying up late at night and playing games with friends we would swap the controller back and. Forth on deaths and no one cared who beat the stupid part just that we got past it. 

CCB: Phew, my trash talking and swearing are not on the top of the bad habit list.  Well that is a f*cking relief.  That said, I let no one, beat any section of Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Chaos Bleeds on my behalf, that game was destined for one girl in all the world who was meant to fight the forces of evil.  Sometimes I cave and let him help, I can’t think of any right now, but it does happen, see my post about the human strategy guide.

What game do you most look forward to playing over the remainder of your 100 days of games with your wife?

This question is a toughie, it reminds me of the scene on Mall Rats where they ask Brodie “what superpower he would choose.”  

One of the games at the top is The Last of Us. That is probably the best game I have played in years, it is such a well crafted story and so emotionally heavy the two main characters are amazing, flawed and change throughout the game.  It's also a game that spoke to me the most about what it's like to be a dad.  It doesn't hurt that the game is absolutely stunning. 

Another that is at the top of my list is Super Dungeon Explore.  SDE is the perfect blend of what I want out of Dungeons and Dragons and old school gaming.  The miniatures and monsters all look so cool, the combat and gameplay is simple enough that the kids can play but deep enough to give it replay.  I've played it a few times with the kids and had a blast but never as a family.  Also the way it is currently played one person (usually me) controls the bad guys and the other players are the heroes. But there is an expansion coming out soon that lets us all play on the same team against the dungeon which is what I am dying to try. 

]\There are lots of other games I want to play with her, (GrimFandango, Tales from the Borderlands, and always more Diablo!!).  There are some other games I have hesitated to try because I'm not sure if she would enjoy them but we still have a lot of days to go and I am super excited. 

What is your favorite gaming memory you have shared with your wife?

This one is super tough because my all time favorite memory was stolen by my lovely wife.  And is also our all night Burnout crash fest. So I have to go to a different favorite.  Which has got to be the night she organized a DnD party for my Birthday. 

The Scene of the Infamous DnD Brawl 10"

Serious DM with his campaign binder

Serious DM with his campaign binder

This memory needs a little background.  I have always been intrigued by the idea of Dungeons and Dragons, but it is an immensely social game.  You need to have at least 3-4 friends who are willing to learn a complicated game and sit for hours basically playing make believe like my son would do.  Yes there are rules and dice involved but it essentially comes down to creating a character or persona that you want to be and going out fighting evil, causing trouble or solving mysteries.

The problem was I never really had a group of friends willing to play so I collected books, made characters and learned rules for years, but it wasn't until I was around 30 that I ever really played.  Chris knew all of this and set up a game on my birthday with a bunch of my friends who also never really played before. I researched and came up with a cool scenario that had the group at a bar and get drawn into a quest where they had to fight goblins.

And then Dr. CCB happened.

I describe the opening scene at a bar and Chris had decided her character didn't like the way one of the guys was looking at her so she threw a chair at him.  One of the great things about this game is you can do anything you want and Chris embraced it. The game from there turned into an all out bar brawl that lasted for an hour or two and the group never even left the tavern or went on the quest. But you know what I didn't even care it was one of the best gaming moments I've ever had. 

CCB: DnD should always have a little WWE in the mix.  I had forgot about this party but I remember my character was built around Faith from BtVS and she was awesome.  I have to honor my favorite wrestler of all time, Stone Cold Steve Austin.  Throw a chair or cold frosty beer in the mix ever so often. 

What we played today. 

Game: Lord of the Rings Card Game

System: Table Top

Developer: Fantasy Flight Games

Reflection: When you live a geek lifestyle you forget that its not everyone’s normal.  I forget that I am a full-grown woman playing a card game until the stares of my fellow educators remind me.  During the union lunch hour we played cards in the lobby of a union conference at the Westin hotel. People seemed intrigued and amused but we only had eyes for the Hill Troll that keeps killing us.  I cannot wait to blog about beating him.  

Today's post in my favorite so far because it reminds me why we started the adventure and how great an adventure it has been. Life is an adventure best shared.