Glitter vs Jem Part 2

Day 53: Should I cut and color my gray hair part 2?

My next few blog posts will break from reflecting on married gaming.  Instead, I am soliciting input from my readers about my hair quandary.  I will tell the story of my own hair journey and ask for input and advice on whether I should cut off my long glittery/silver locks and dye my hair an outrageous color? 

All natural waves and gray

Flat ironed rogue strip

PRO GRAY HAIR: Rogue and Real Hair

Thanks to genetics, I started going gray when I was in my late teens and I used to color my hair every month because that is what you do.  But in 2012 I started my doctoral program and to cut family expenses I decided to forego my one beauty treatment.  The 80 dollars cost converts to a new video game a month and it was easier to stop than you would imagine.  I was pleased when a defined streak of gray appeared that looked much like Rogue from X-men.  Over the last 3 years I get regular commentary on my hair from men and women of all ages.  People either hate or love my gray hair.

In 2013 I was in a Vespa collision that shattered my left wrist and forearm.  After surgery and subsequent recovery I could not wash or style my own hair.  I was forced to accept the natural waves and frizz that can be tamed with a few spritzes introduced by my mother-in-law.  With only one working hand I still maintained a 4.0 GPA in my doctoral program and fully embraced my natural hair color and wave. 

Fast-forward to now.  I am conflicted between keeping my God-given glitter or going for a Jem-style? In some small measure I want to feel sexy, and trendy, and truly outrageous.  The superficial voice has been long over-ruled by my own strong sense of self that thinks I do not have to buy into social norms of feminine beauty.  A major change on the outside will not make me a better or different gamer, professor, wife, or person.

PRO GEM HAIR: Grandma’s Greatest Regret

I have been surprised that so many people in real life are critical of my gray, but online there have been very few people that advocate for a hair change.

Unlike the hubs who loves to spend money and crazy spoils our kiddos I am a frugal person.  I worry that my resistance to change is less of feminist principle and more related to my inability to be frivolous and fun when it comes to myself. Even if I change my hair I will never be a girly-girl, I would just be a gamer geek mom with a new haircut. 

The loudest opponent of my gray hair is my grandmother.  In her prime my grandmother had at least 5 different color beehives, a large collection of hair extensions, and infamously hid from my grandfather that she was not a real redhead until after their marriage.  She recently shared that one of her greatest regrets was never having platinum blonde hair. I hate to be seventy years old and sharing with her same the regret.

But then again maybe I will wish I spent more money on yoga and beer and less on hair color.